i've been taught from young, that if God takes one thing from you, it's only because He wants to give you something better. and the more we hold on to the things we have, the more likely we will lose it. it doesnt make sense... when i was younger, i used to picture loving person is like holding sand in ur hand, the tighter u squeeze, the less and less you have... but if u release to much, u lose them all the same...

and as u grow older u realise, people slip by u not becos of how much u hold on to them or how much u dont... whether they mean to stay or go, there really isnt much u can do, except to adapt to their presence or absence... fatalism? i dont know

for those of u not in the know... yes, i am single... if u only know about my breaking from this blog, then i dont think u shd bother asking much. was this statement too offensive? but this is me, take it or leave it... hahahahah i dont reali care... just that i realise if someone's concern for u only comes along when they've heard that something BAD has happened to u, then i have serious doubts about how sincere is that concern really?... of cos, this applies to myself also. done a personality that says i am a carer... surprising rite? me? a carer? i'm a thinker. i dont like being a carer, indecisive, too eager to please, so how sincere is my concern to others? i want to be genuine, not fake, and always checking myself to make sure i am NOT FAKE... but if a carer is wat God has changed me... then i guess i can onli accept the strengths and work on the weaknesses...

have u lost your sense of humor? i noe i have lost mine during the past few months, mayb it's the depression i was going thru, but dun worry i m ok now... remember my bunnies? they r coming to stay with me for a few days. quite excited, hope to get some good pics of them... i'm now going a process of self-discovery, so weird being single again... a lot of things to get used to... the free time, the lonely wkends, and visits to the doctor alone... which i really hate. my blogging frequency has gone become less n less.. mayb one day i wil stop... but then who's to know... i'm not in it for readers or awards, it's just records of my uninteresting thoughts for those who care to read...

thought of the day: who's the person u want to treasure the most in ur life? do something about it :-)